 THE next time a flag waving England fan says Sven's boys are going to win the World Cup, push your face up as close as possible and shout: "I PITY YOU." Once they've been assured a call to the local constabulary isn't required, ask them the following. What have Paraguay, Cameroon, Belgium and Denmark got in common? They're the only giants of the international game England have beaten in the World Cup knockout stage since 1966. There's a fine line between boisterous self-confidence and unjustified arrogance. England consistently trip up on the wrong side. In international football, all England has ever done is win a few back-to-back home games in 1966, winning thanks to the most dubious goal in the competition's history. Our last five World Cups were ended by Brazil, Argentina, Germany (twice) and Spain. When the going gets tough, the only place England get going to is the airport. Three lions? Three Siamese kittens, more like. Such negativity will provoke the St George's flag brigade to recoil in horror, but the facts are clear. The rest of the world laughs at our bravado, identifying a land with illusions of grandeur. We portray the players as Churchillian war heroes, ready to invade foreign soil and return to a land fit for heroes. Actually, we're more like Dad's Army. Brian Barwick is looking like Captain Mainwaring, Sven's a rich man's Clive Dunn and, sorry Crouchy, there's a touch of Pike there. As for Walker the cockney spiv, David Beckham, anyone? The psyche heading into major tournaments is utterly wrong. Winning the World Cup should be an aspiration dripped in hope, not expectation. Rather than demand victory, we should acknowledge a quarter-final place as success. | 
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