THE Equal Opportunities Act in the workplace came into law more than 30 years ago. Unfortunately, the Equal Application to Domestic Duties in the Home act seems to be taking much longer. And for British businesswomen, it appears that the higher up the career ladder you climb, the harder it becomes. Liverpool-based financial services group Bibby recently commissioned a survey on juggling work with home and found most women under the age of 45 spend 15 hours on housework a week, compared to the average of between two and five hours for men. The group has even suggested a new nickname for these women, DIALLS or Do It Alls. "Regardless of whether they have a demanding day job, women still bear the responsibility for the majority of domestic chores in the home," says Bibby chief executive David Robertson. The findings come as no surprise to chartered accountant Carol McLachlan, of Prenton, who juggles running two coaching businesses from home with bringing up two children, Mia, seven, and 10-year-old Ben. "I would agree with the survey findings based on the experience of my clients, friends and family and it struck of very personal chord," says Carol whose website www.worksmartplayhard.co.uk coaches people on achieving a better work/life balance. "When I worked full-time for Ernst & Young I was away from home a few nights a week and my husband, Andy, and I had a plan in place. However, when I started to work from home, most of the domestic duties came to me. At its worst, I would estimate I was doing 20 hours of housework a week to zero for my husband. "Thankfully, we have resolved the situation now and it is a much better balance. "Part of the problem is that women are their own worst enemies. We all have so many more choices now and much higher expectations for ourselves. And it is so important to have a plan in place so that resentment doesn’t build up." So, will it take another generation for the Equal Opportunities Act to hit home or are we making it even harder for future generations ? Here, three busy Merseyside businesswomen share their views on the problems of work/life balance..
JULIE CONSTABLE, 39, is director of Constables Estate Agents, in Neston. She has a 25-year-old stepson and two daughters, aged 18 and 17.
“I definitely agree with the survey findings. As a businesswoman and mother, you are constantly thinking about what needs to be done next and trying to prioritise. “This certainly proves the point that women are multi- skilled and that they can have a very successful career but also run a very smooth ship at home. “I also think that, in certain circumstances we can actually make some work for ourselves as we may overcompensate that guilty feeling that you have for not being able to collect the children from school. “Today, I think most families have both parents working just to make ends meet. I was fortunate in the help from a wonderful mum and a very good after-school club. The domestic duties, however, would usually be done after the children had gone to bed or at least when they had been fed and watered. I used to frequent my local supermarket at 11pm at night to get shopping for the next couple of days, washing and ironing would be done late in the evening whilst watching something on the television. “My parents were brought up with a ‘woman's place is in the home’ and that’s where my mother stayed, being the dutiful wife and mother until my sister and I were old enough to look after ourselves. “However, if my parents had had a son, I feel he would have been treated the same way as my father in that he could go out to work come home and have his tea on the table. Today, there is also a difference. There is far more peer pressure today than I can ever remember for parents and for children. You have to have this and you have to have that. “The cost of living is far greater today, and there is more variety with everything, the world seems to be moving on at a far greater pace. “I would like to think that it will not change as quickly for the children, but I’m sure the usual inflations will happen.
“My advice to both my daughters would be to look for a modern man who wants to share; after all, that’s what relationships are all about. It’s a 100% commitment and responsibility for both a father and a mother who would probably be working similar hours if both full time, so it makes sense to share the chores.”
EMMANUELLE FOURNIER- KELLY, 37, runs two businesses with her husband, John. They own Emmanuelle ladies fashion boutique and The New England Guest House in Southport. Emmanuelle has two children, Tallulah, six, and Othello, 16. “Although I must recognise that fathers (and especially my husband) are more involved in the domestic duties, it is society that has not moved. “Although John and I take it in turns to drop off Tallulah for her swimming lessons, it was me who was publicly insulted by a member of the swimming staff for not having paid on time and not my husband. “I am a very lucky woman in the sense that my husband is fantastic around the house. So there are no specific delegations in our household regarding cooking and cleaning. “We are also trying to teach the children to be as independent as possible. Othello has been educated since he was 12 to iron his own clothes and do his own washing. As for his sister, she is learning to dress by herself. ”Living in a guest house means the place must be immaculate at all times, so doing the laundry and keeping the place clean are a priority. I usually work a few hours every day in the boutique and work there all day every other Sunday. John takes care of all the maintenance in the guest house and the boutique, and every other week we go to Manchester together to buy new stock for the boutique. “For the cooking, whoever is available will cook while the other helps with the children's homework. “Once the little one is in bed, we both clear up and then set the tables for the guests. Finally, I do the books for the boutique, and then check the emails. We rarely manage to watch a film until the end as we are too exhausted to do so. “However, despite our very hectic lifestyle, we try to make a point of going for a spa treatment every month, to the gym twice a week, eating out a couple of times a week and force ourselves to switch off completely from work at least once a week to spend time with our family. ”What we share with our parents’ generation is that, as mothers, we are taking care of the domestic duties and looking after the children. What we don't share is that, on top of four hours of domestic chores per day, we must add another eight hours of work. “I personally think it will change by the time my children's generation are parents, in the sense that mothers will feel less and less guilty about delegating other people to help them out with childcare and household duties. Already, there are more and more households employing other people from outside the house." “I will advise my daughter not to over-do it and delegate whenever possible and look after herself, but above all work as a team with her partner.
JANE WAFER, 40, is deputy head of a children and family centre in Liverpool. She lives in Knowsley with her husband, Dave, and their daughter, Hana, nine. “I have to agree with the survey. My husband will do his own ironing and does attempt to help with the domestic chores. I would say he does about a third of the housework. “There are limits on what he will do. He does hoover and wash the dishes but he does no gardening, cooking, dusting, cleaning and even DIY. “When I was younger, both my parents worked. My mother worked part-time and my dad rarely did any housework. I would say my husband does a little more than my father did. I am not sure things will have changed for my own daughter as it doesn’t seem to have changed much compared to how my own parents divided the domestic chores. “I have been married for nearly 20 years now and, when I first got married, I was happy to take on the domestic role. “As my career has changed, with a hugely responsible senior position, working long hours and earning more money than my husband, the load of the domestic duties have not been shared. “I sometimes feel I should take responsibility for that as, over the years, I have just let it happen and evolve. “Now I would say to Hana ‘start as you mean to go on’ and talk about this issue sooner, rather than later, as most of our arguments revolve around housework.”
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